I could also title this ‘people are more than their looks’ because it’s not just bodies, or hair, or clothes, or makeup, or nails….so WHY are these the things that get the most attention?
I can’t tell you how many times a day I (and we all) hear people comment on the way others look….often, the way strangers look. Why is this the most important thing? Why do we care more about someone’s blow out than the brains underneath it? Why is the fit of someone’s dress enough to silence their words? Most of all, why do people in their living rooms deserve to criticize those who put themselves out there on TV because of where passion has guided their career? Any answers? I’ve got nothing.
Here’s what I have noticed. Living by example is truly the most important way to influence and teach people. I wouldn’t describe myself as the most confident person in terms of my own body/looks. It’s a constant work in progress to feel good about how I look, but it’s working against the grain (how many women do you know who love their appearance?) and that is a pretty slow going process. It would probably surprise some people that I’m not body confident. I am not and never have been “overweight”, I was never teased for my looks, overall I look pretty normal. No one has ever told me I am too fat, too thin, too bulky, too weak. No one has told me I’m ugly. So where does this come from? I’ve realized with age and a keen awareness that it comes from those comments we hear all the time about looks. People who are close to me might not be talking about my looks, but if they are constantly commenting on others’ looks that still sends a message. That sends a message that looks are highly important, clothes are important, hair should be presentable, and all of it had better be spot on if others are going to see you. What else sends a message? The we speak about ourselves. Why would I be super confident if the closest females in my life pick apart their own bodies? That stark contrast feels strange, so we all end up getting sucked into beating ourselves up for no good reason.
We hear this from the time we are little kids: it’s what’s on the inside that counts. Our bodies are vessels for brains, deep souls, big ideas, bold love, strong ambition, and giant laughs! Can we focus on that? Can we challenge ourselves and each other to give credit for what really counts, and, if positivity is a stretch, let’s just *ignore* appearance for now.
*a little p.s. I am writing this for myself as much as I am for anyone else. I definitely am far from perfect in terms of living this positive lifestyle. It’s all too easy to get wrapped up in looks, but I’m trying to change that! So hold me accountable, I’m taking the challenge too!